psychosis
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Overcoming the odds
Everyday I get up and keep going, despite multiple psychoses behind. Everyday I overcome a terrible feeling of shame and show up to the world for the sake of my son. I can do it, I tell myself, and I fight for the space on earth – I still managed to create with my diagnosis […] Continue reading
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On Being Jesus
Each Sunday morning, when I do manage to attend a service at a Christian Church I like to go to, I catch myself thinking the exactly same thought: It would be interesting to see what a single bored consultant psychiatrist would do with the entire segregation in five minutes time. Call it a mass psychosis, […] Continue reading
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The Devil’s Ball
It was while living in Sheffield that I ended up attending the devil’s ball. I woke up in one of my lucid-dreaming and found myself waiting on the road, somewhere near a Dutch forest. If you are not familiar with lucid-dreaming, let me explain. It is a state when you wake up in your dream […] Continue reading
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A Crush on a Russian and Bipolar Disorder (By Guest Blogger: David Williams)
I remember my first crush was on a Russian gymnast called Yelena Davidova. I had the copy of Newsweek when she was on the front cover. She was the women’s artistic individual all-around champion at the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow. I was 14 and intensely miserable. I had undergone a transformative experience at 13, […] Continue reading
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Hypnosis, cigarettes, and champagne
By that time I was already in full-blown psychosis, but when you are in this state, you don’t really notice. And why should you, especially when you feel happy and complete at the same time? Psychosis as such is a culturally misunderstood concept, but I feel like I could share a few insights on the […] Continue reading
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Damn the banks: I need some beauty treatment
So, I was analysing banks on that particular morning. Or rather I was trying to analyse them. The task can be considered as easy, of course, but not when you hate financial analysis and banks in particular. Mind you, till that rainy morning I wasn’t aware of my problem. In fact, I had no […] Continue reading
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One magical day in Amsterdam
I have a friend who believed all his life that in his previous incarnation he was Napoleon. Nothing is wrong with this belief (which might be true as a matter of fact), but be careful to whom you reveal your deepest secret. My friend started to talk about his Napoleonic ambitions at his work. Well, […] Continue reading
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What is Psychosis?
According to the Chinese ancient wisdom, everything in this universe evolves within yin and yang energy. Yin represents the feminine, water and passive. Yang is the male, fire and active. Both have to be in harmony, which exists to maintain balance in our universe and within each of us. My body had to undergo […] Continue reading
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When I met Robbie Williams
The story began when Robbie Williams left a comment under my own comment under one of his songs on Youtube. If you forgot to listen to the guy recently, I strongly recommend to correct this grave mistake and listen to him right now. His voice is amazing: soothing and calming – it helps me to […] Continue reading
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A Peek Inside the Modern Asylum
The psychiatric hospital of today might appear as a foreign, scary object to the mind who has never visited the institution. It represents the unknown, the territory that one is terrified of, but at the same time attracted to with natural human curiosity. Let’s be frank here: we want to know what is inside and […] Continue reading
About Me
My name is Ekaterina and I am a Doctor of Philosophy, lecturer and writer. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 27, because of psychoses, I have kept on going, despite the odds. In my daily life I work, look after my son, and have friends around the world. I speak 4 languages fluently and I lived in 4 different countries.